Hey everyone :) TL;DR: at the bottom. First and foremost, I want to say thank you. I am not especially comfortable asking for help. I like my independence. But these past few months, I have needed help. And all of you answered that call. It’s truly humbling how much support I felt (and still feel) from my community. I can’t say it enough: thank you so much. You’ve all contributed to my healing, and I am so grateful. I know many of you are eager for an update. The good news: my surgery was successful, and I’ve been healing really well. At this point, my pain is pretty minor, and I’ve been able to return to mostly-normal activity. Not quite pre-surgery level normal, but getting better. Unfortunately, there’s bad news too. During surgery, my medical team did find cancer in one lymph node. The lymph node was removed along with the cancerous tumor from my breast, but that’s not the end of it. There are likely individual cancer cells remaining in my body, so small that they can’t be detected through any means we currently have. That means I need additional treatment to reduce the risk of those remaining cells growing into more cancer in the future. This is especially crucial because if those cells grow into a recurrence of cancer, it is likely to return in the lung, liver, or bone, and if this happens, it’s typically Stage 4: treatable, but not curable. This was devastating news to receive, as you can imagine. I started to realize that this surgery, this massive, scary thing that I had just conquered, the biggest medical experience of my life so far - was actually just the beginning. Just one phase of a much longer, more serious ordeal than I had understood, up to that point. After weeks of waiting on test results, and meeting with three different oncologists with three different opinions on how to proceed, I finally have some clarity. My treatment plan is aggressive: chemotherapy, followed by radiation, followed by endocrine therapy. All of these treatments are to reduce the risk of recurrence. They are all going to suck. Chemotherapy is about 3 months. Radiation is another 3-4 weeks. Endocrine therapy is long-term (5-10 years). I get started in a few weeks. And my lifestyle has to change, too. My breast cancer is hormone-positive. This means I need to stop my body’s production of estrogen, which is where endocrine therapy comes in. But estrogen comes from a variety of sources, not just our own endocrine systems. Poor diet, lack of exercise, alcohol - even using the wrong type of cosmetic products - all of these impact estrogen production. All of the healthy habits that all of us should be practicing all the time - these are now non-negotiables for me. And that’s going to be true for the rest of my life, essentially. Right now, I’m in a narrow window where I've recovered well enough from surgery that I feel mostly normal, but I’ll only have a few weeks of normalcy before starting chemo treatment. And then I’ll really be in the shit. I’m honestly so terrified. I’m afraid of how I’ll feel. I’m afraid of how I’ll look. I’m afraid of the many, many side effects I may experience. I’m afraid some of them will be long-lasting. The most frustrating thing about all of this fear is that it will never truly go away. Even though I’ve elected a very aggressive treatment path, none of these treatments, alone or in combination, can reduce my risk of recurrence to zero. I’ll have to learn to live with that. But it sounds easier to live with if I know I chose the path that increased the odds in my favor as much as possible. And the truth is, I’m going to need more help: emotional, physical, financial, household - honestly, all of it. I don’t know exactly what this will look like, except maybe the money stuff. Thankfully, my insurance is good, and many of you were really generous when I first shared the news of my cancer, so financial stress hasn’t been much of an issue up until now. However, I am likely to miss out on 3 upcoming weeks of pay because of the way FMLA’s leave policy works around school breaks. I have a long wishlist again, filled with items recommended by my doctors and other patients via support message boards. I’ve reopened the meal train for the weeks I’m receiving chemo, starting November 3rd and continuing through January. I can manage these expenses without financial support, but not without significant effort, and I know people want to help. If you want to help me with the odds-and-ends costs, or the lost wages of nearly a month, the easiest way to do so is directly (venmo, zelle, cashapp, whatever). As for all of those other needs, I think the best thing you can do to support me is to just keep checking in. I’m not always going to be up for a visit or a phone call, but a text or a DM is always welcome, even if I don’t answer right away. And sometimes I will want that visit or call! It’s hard to predict what my social capacity will be, but I know I won’t mind a text to check and see how it’s going, or if I need anything specific at that time. A lot of my support is going to fall to Thomas, so check in with him too. On that note, I need to say publicly how unbelievably amazing a partner Thomas has been throughout this time. It’s cliche, but words really can’t communicate all he’s done for me. And I have no doubt that will continue throughout the duration of my treatments. I can’t imagine going through this without him. He’s patient and warm when all I can do is cry. He’s goofy when I need to smile. He’s thoughtful and quiet when he knows I need time to process something. He’s practical when Squeegee needs a walk, or the dishes need washing, or I need ice cream, like, right now. He’s even accommodating when all I want to do is mainline feel-good, formulaic TV like the Great British Bake-Off. What I’m going through is hard, but Thomas is going through it too, and the toll cancer takes on caretakers is uniquely fucked up in its own way. And he has been tireless in his care of me, despite that. Once again, I cannot say enough how grateful I am to all of you, for everything you’ve already done and anything you might do over the coming months. THANK YOU - for your direct support, for your understanding, for your check-in texts, for your offers of help at home, for all of it. As terrible and prolonged as this time is, I know it’s temporary, and all of your support really does help me get through it. I love you. TL;DR: My surgery went well, but I need aggressive treatment to limit my risk of serious recurrence. I’m doing chemo, radiation, and endocrine therapy, and starting very soon. I’m really unhappy about it, and scared, but it’s the best plan I have. If you want to help, I’m going to need financial support the most. I’m incredibly grateful to my entire community for EVERY form of help I’m receiving. Thank you so much. I love you.