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In reading this memoir those who love a man coping with pregnancy loss and infant death will come to better understand the male experience with this kind of grief.
When Dan, a writer with a passion for underground comics, and his wife Bekah, a potter dedicated to traditional Japanese ceramics, met through a mutual friend, they swiftly fell in love. “Of all the women I’ve ever met,” Dan told a friend, “she’s the first one who felt like family.” But at Christmas, as they prepared for the birth of their first child, tragedy struck.
Based on Daniel Raeburn’s acclaimed New Yorker essay, Vessels: A Love Story is the story of how he and Bekah clashed and clung to each other through a series of unsuccessful pregnancies before finally, joyfully, becoming parents. In prose as handsomely unadorned as his wife’s pottery, Raeburn recounts a marriage cemented by the same events that nearly broke it.
Vessels is an unflinching, enormously moving account of intimacy, endurance, and love. These qualities make it a top pick of the editorial staff at Give InKind.
Why We Love This Gift: We love this gift because it perfectly describes the experience of grief men feel after baby loss. When people better understand the experience of fathers in loss, they will be better able to provide support. This is good for men. It is good for women. It is good for families.
What To Express in Your Card: I read that this book is a work of art. It may or may not resonate with you. I don't know how you feel, but the point is I'd like to hear from you about just that. I am thinking of you. Maybe we can meet for coffee? I'll text you later to see what your schedule looks like.
Possible Triggers: This book touches on a theme of loss, but also a baby born healthy after loss. For the parent who may not yet be ready to go there, or who is unable to attempt pregnancy again, consideration may be key.