My Aunt Lauren shared the following on FB, this family needs help. I can not do much from Florida, but I can organize a meal train and have food delivered. Please help if you can. Doug is not well, amd he has not been well for many months. His lung CT in April was his last real trip out of the house, but even before that, his 02 needs have been unbelievably high, his heart rate has been funky, and we've been trying antibiotics, antifungals, and steroids in different doses and combinations since before Thanksgiving with little improvement. Panic is both a common result of oxygen deprivation for patients with lung disease and it is a complication of Doug's claustrophobia. This spring, he has had intense and recurrent panic attacks that don't really respond to anti-anxiety meds. Recently, he's had a combination of tons of mucus coming from his lungs, quickly dropping to hypoxia when he takes his 02 off, and heart rate issues. We've tried 4 times to get to an echocardiogram and I finally found a mobile echo out of Atlanta to come amd worked with the pulmonologist to get the referral. But Doug isn't wanting to eat much because it's so hard. His bedsore was almost healed, but it's now moving in the wrong direction and caring for it is difficult because Doug can't stand or lay on his side without immediate loss of 02. I am exhausted. I'm completely spent. My career is ruined, our finances are a disaster, I'm struggling to keep up with the kids' needs and being a 24-hour caregiver. I don't know what is next for us. I don't need unhelpful advice, like "hey, you should just go to a hospital" or "have you thought about...". Believe me, I have thought about more than any other person who is suggesting things to me. If I am not already doing it, there's a good reason. Doug doesn't have "long covid" -- I hate that term. He has lung failure at the least, maybe cardiopulmonary failure. He hasn't had a real bath or shower or used a real toilet or walked more than a few steps and a turn in 3 years. I have tried to be as positive and uplifting and optimistic as possible and to celebrate all of the little wins because I know Doug is doing his best and I honestly thought God was with me on this. But Doug It's alive today because of me. Granted he also got covid because of me. I feel as if we are trapped on the Titanic and we're all going down. My kids don't have much safety net, in terms of family or the kind of friends who can just take over for me. Our homeschool community has already gone above and beyond. I don't honestly want prayers, though Doug might. I am pretty angry at God. Either I filled myself and it was all me telling myself what I wanted to hear, or God lied. The last 3 years have destroyed Doug, me, the kids, my family, my law practice, our entire future...everything has suffered massively. What I could really use is food I don't have to cook. I don't have the income to keep buying meals out. I also don't have time to stand over the stove. I go days where I don't get to take a shower because of my choices to bathe or work or sleep I tried to do the other things that are more important. Now that Doug isn't eating, I really don't care about food...I have eaten my feelings for 3 years now and I'm quite fat--I've eaten a ton of everything and there is literally nothing I want to eat. But Sam and Isobel need nutritious meals... If anyone has the desire and wherewithal to make a meal train and coordinate for me, I would appreciate it but I know it's hard to read a bunch of negativity and want to help. I do appreciate the many homeschool moms, teachers, dance and music families, and church families who have helped. I wish we had more family nearby to.take the kids, but I am so grateful for every bit of love Sam amd Isobel get. ❤