Give InKind’s Care Calendar helps answer the central question of how to give or receive support. In this case, how to set up a support page for yourself, a friend, or a family member who has welcomed twins, triplets, or other multiples.
Any new baby is a shock to the system – and an explosion of love and learning. Double or triple that? Bring it. However, a village must gather and organize. Begin by identifying a close friend or family member who can sit down with both parents to understand schedules, and anything else parents may wish to factor in. The so-called Fourth trimester is always complicated and beautiful, but when the work is double or triple it can be overwhelming. Make sure to check-in. If a new parent shares that s/he is overwhelmed, remind that anyone would be. Ask what concrete thing you can do to help. If they seem hesitant to say, make specific suggestions. Listen carefully. Create channels of communication. (Take a look at a Sample Give InKind Support Page for a Family Welcoming Multiples.)
For parents of newborn multiples, getting organized is key. Add as many items to the custom Care Calendar are necessary. In coordinating help, you are demonstrating the village in action. You are showing parents that you have their back(s) during a time through which they may feel exhausted and vulnerable, even as they love their babies.
- Food: Meals and groceries for the family are always among the most popular calendar items. This is especially true for parents of multiples. These parents seldom have a free hand. Being fed is being loved. Send as much food as ready to eat as possible. Do the parents have any dietary restrictions? If the mom is learning to nurse, be mindful of any ingredients that might impact lactation. Bonus points for protein bars and other things can be eaten with one hand. Consider delivering food in bell jars portioned out – ready to dump into a microwave bowl, heat, and eat. Or, go ahead and organize a gift card train – so that they can decide what they want to eat and when.
- Childcare: If there are older children to consider, you can easily build that into the Care Calendar. It is always nice to celebrate the singular role of older children as their place in the family shifts. Parents of multiples comment that the most helpful thing anyone did for them was taking their older child/ren on an outing and giving them some extra love and attention.
- Pet Care: Are there pets to care for? Arrange daily dog walks.
- Home Services: Add calendar events for tasks like housecleaning while they’re at the pediatrician for a check-up or schedule a gigantic weekly laundry wash and fold session. Is there a lot of furniture to assemble? Two cribs? Two high chairs? Go to it. Remember not to visit unless asked to do so. If you are dropping something off, drop and run.
- Other: “Other" is the ultimate catch-all category. This is a great way to create opportunities for connections. If a new mom is learning to nurse, check in with her about that. Remind her that many women find it stressful and painful. See whether she could use any support, and remind her that fed is best. Love wins the day. Designate an evening to a Ladies Night video call for mom, or a recurring day for Friends and Family video call.
The fundraising section can be beneficial for unexpected expenses. Ask whether extra cash would be useful. If there is such a need, simply enable the fundraising button on your InKind page and connect your PayPal or GoFundMe account.
The Give InKind Wishlist is another opportunity for others to meaningfully support a quarantined family with new babies. Remember that for multiples, it is necessary to have twice the gear for twins, three times as much for triplets, and so on. Also recommended by parents pajamas that zip (no buttons or snaps) and more swaddle blankets than you ever thought possible. Browse Give InKind’s curated list for suggested items. When you see an item that could be helpful, use the “+" icon to add to your Wishlist.
You may also add an existing Amazon Wishlist to your InKind page for items that may be leftover from their registry.
Use Give InKind’s do-not-disturb section to let others know about the family’s communication preferences. Keep in mind that these preferences can be easily turned on or off as a situation changes.
- Phone Calls: How do the parents like to communicate – a phone call or text? With a new baby, it can be impossible to know when the baby is sleeping. Parents of multiples often find schedules to be important, so make sure not to call or text unless you know it will not disrupt their sleep schedules.
- Visitors: Ask parents about their level of comfort with visitors. Parents may welcome visitors – but make sure to define parameters and create definite boundaries. We lovingly remind that visits should be short.
- Flowers: Flowers can be great to brighten up a home. In this case, they may not the most important thing, but they are still very lovely and certainly worth considering.
Add unlimited updates to keep friends and family informed. This is a great place for a designated page manager to keep family and friends up to date or for the recipient to “blog" or “journal" their experience if they wish to do so. Add as many updates as you or the parents like to keep friends and family up to date. Create your Give InKind Support Page here.
Give InKind does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. We have an affiliate relationship with many of the advertisers on our site, and may receive a commission from any products purchased from links in this article. See Terms & Conditions.